After a lot of looking around, my pal Chris finally found this python script that successfully converts a KML (Google Earth) file to an ESRI shapefile:
http://arcscripts.esri.com/details.asp?dbid=15603
I started with a KMZ, saved it as a KML from Google Earth, and proceeded from there.
(Hi, me, one year from now, when I am googling for this same thing again....)